Un-crushing in the Digital Age (2015)

I liked him, I did.

Not an idea,

A cinematic fantasy of Austen-esque heroes.

I didn’t want the veneer.

 

I wanted him.

My cheeks bloomed pink at the sight of him,

His thoughts were cities I wanted to tour forever.

I did not dream him into anything outside of earthbound.

 

I wanted him.

I wanted him even after I knew not to.

We weren’t made of the same matter.

There was no atomic intention for us.

 

The best visitors aren’t always meant to say.

What was I going to do?

Clutch until my knuckles were as white as the ghost he is?

Hope the dead weight of what this wasn’t didn’t burden me more than disappointment?

The idea of him is always the hardest to part with, you know.

 

This is how it ends,

Not with a bang,

But with a Twitter unfollow.

This is how I lose him,

Swallowed into my newsfeed.

 

It’s so anti-climactic

Spaces reserved for him house something else now.

He was a tenant where I held the deed.

His name blends into the sounds of traffic.

Once in a while, I’ll remember him.

And I wish him well,

The very best,

Because  I really liked him.